The Dam and being in love

So I spent the weekend in Amsterdam with my soulmate Peter and his lovely wife in their home.  Friday saw me wakening at an ungodly hour of 4.15am worrying myself sick that I was going to miss my flight at 7.05am! So arriving at the airport with a very small bag! Yes I actually managed to pack light! I resisted the urge to take my beloved spiky boots thinking that there is no way they would allow them on as hand luggage!

Arriving eventually in the Dam I came out to no Peter and couldn’t get my phone to work for a good 10 minutes and worried then where I was sleeping that night before thinking ‘ ah well I will just get a hotel, I’ve been here tons before’. Then I realised I hadn’t switched roaming on! Sigh! So as I did the messages from Peter started coming through saying he was at the other arrivals gate! Sigh! All that worry for nothing! Dutch kisses were in order and I forgot there were meant to be 3!! Ha ha! It wasn’t the first time I got it wrong during the weekend!! Ha ha!

Driving to his home, he pointed out various places and told me the history of the place, it makes such a difference to seeing somewhere when you know more about the place!My room was at the top of the house which was lovely as I had to go up very steep stairs to get there as in all Dutch accommodation.  That night with his lovely wife we set off for the Red Light District and he explained about the new mayor and the differences that are happening to Amsterdam.

It was very apparent to me that there have been major changes and a lot of the windows are now empty! It’s quite sad to see the difference since I was last there 2 and a half years ago. Yet the heart of it all is still there I suppose but if it changes much more, then it will definitely not be the same.  I suppose the tourists there for the first time do not notice it though?

We didn’t stay long in the city as all of us were tired but still that didn’t stop us going back home and drinking a lot of wine and chatting for hours!  Getting up on Saturday I had the pleasure ahead of me of meeting the very lovely Rebel and her husband T.

I was excited going to the airport to meet them there (it’s an easy place to meet rather than trying to negotiate the tourist in the city). I wasn’t nervous in the slightest as she has become a real friend and I was sure that she would be as lovely as she is online just like everyone else I have met on this trip! I was wrong!  She is even lovelier in person than she is online and we chatted for a few hours about anything and everything like old friends! Her husband was just as lovely and suggested I just call him T since I couldn’t for the life of me pronounce his name correctly! Ha ha!

I was sad to say goodbye when they had to eventually go as it was fun to meet them and be able to put a face and voices to the words that helped me for so long when I was going through an extremely hard time on my own in Australia.

It’s funny to think that my support line at that time was people who I had never had the privilege to meet yet they saved my life in more ways than they could possibly realise! People who had been friends in the UK were no longer there with me having left and gone to Australia. My twitter friends were the only ones I had then.  I was too ill to go out and make any friends then, yet there they all were; offering kind words and words of encouragement to keep me going.  I know that it was hard at the time for a lot of people to see the words I was writing and the despair they showed.  I appreciate those who stuck by me and whatever happens in my future I will never ever forget them or what they did for a complete stranger!

So…. to the Dam again! After leaving Rebel and T, I headed into the city to wander and see the sights yet again.  I love the architecture there (I was going to be an architect at one point and was top of my school for technical and engineering drawing all through school.  I had a conditional acceptance for the London College of Architecture when I was just 14 but having to leave school at 15 meant that dream sailed by and I went into the music industry instead.)

Ok! Off track again! Ha ha! I wandered Amsterdam for so long that I managed over 61,000 steps!! Jeez!

Evidence that I actually walked that far in the Dam!! I sat in my favourite bar too for a few hours and people watched as they walked off of Dam Square and wandered up onto Damstraat where the Bavaria Pub is. The sun was shining and I sat just enjoying my own company and planning where I will take my Mistress when we return in March next year.  There are all sorts of places that I know she will want to go. Like the Van Gogh museum, the Torture Museum, the Sex Museum, Anne Frank House, a trip to the cheese market and windmills, and of course my favourite coffee shops in Leidesplein and off the Red Light District to name but a few!

So the whole time I was there I spoke to my Lady.  I miss her so much it hurts me to be apart from her! I thought it would be easy enough since I have no routine and lots of people and places to go to – but it isn’t.  It’s hell! I can’t ever be apart from her again, this I know for sure now!  Peter and his wife told me they can see how much I love her when I talk about her.  I shine when I mention her and talk about things we have done or spoken about together.  It surprised me as soon as I walked through the gate at the airport that I wanted to run back again and hold her and not go on my trip! I thought it wouldn’t be so bad! I think a lot of things and normally I am not wrong, but lately since I met her I have been wrong about everything.  I am lucky that she has had so much patience with me and that she didn’t let me run away from her when I tried to.

So I spent my time in Amsterdam, walking the streets and thinking of my love.  I miss her so and wanted to be with just her.  I called her on the Saturday when I knew she was not expecting me to and the joy in her voice made my heart soar.  No one ever has loved me as has she.  If I live to be 99, I don’t think anyone ever will.

Sunday I began to feel tired but it wasn’t so bad as I spent the day with Peter and his wife and we went to the local outlet shopping. Superdry jacket for me at a fraction of the cost it would be in UK or Australia! Happy me but still sad without my Lady! I hadn’t quite realised where we were going for dinner until we were there as I hadn’t quite caught what Peter had said when he mentioned it.  Turns out it was his folks! I felt so so honoured to be invited (Peter said they insisted that I come!).  We had schnitzel, apple sauce and salad and little roast potato things which the name of escapes me! It was so lovely to sit there and listen to the Dutch words and pick out those which I knew piecing together the conversation before it was translated for me.

It was a lovely day and lovely company, I felt so honoured to be invited into their home and to be there with them all.  Peter is my soulmate, we have discussed this so many times. We were both searching for thyroid information and found one another.  Through him I found another world of kink, as he followed people who had thyroid problems but were also writers of erotica. So that is when I started writing! I have him to thank for a lot of things, but that is probably one of the top ones I have to be thankful to him for.  He is my friend, my soulmate and the reason I write.  My very first book will have a dedication to him in it for sure. Without him I would not have found this life or all the information I did about thyroid, or for that matter be sane.  It was a huge privilege to be there in his home and meet him and his wife at long last and find he was exactly the same as I had found online. We even had moments of silence like you can only have with a true friend when there is no need to even talk and it felt good.  My friend, I love you and I will always be grateful and thankful that you are my friend, my soulmate and are in my life.  Thank you so much for having me to stay.

And my Lady… I love you so much, I cannot wait to come home to you and be at your feet where I belong.  Where my heart sings and my eyes shine and I feel so content, I could die happy.  I miss you, I need you and want you and am never leaving without you again.

Amsterdam and in love – I know it’s normally Paris, but that is where my Lady and I will be next year and we will walk hand in hand down the canals as I show her the world where I’ve already been.  We are very much in love and we will be there and it will be the most romantic city in the world the days we are there.  I cannot wait to show her it all.