The prompt for this week is this picture, and although I have been really really busy I really wanted to write about this since it is a hard limit for me.
I wrote a story last year about masturbating for a Mistress (see it here) and as usual my stories are based on my life, some truer than others. So of course I have been slightly adverse to my Mistress reading too many of my stories for that reason, she is sadistic enough without seeing too much of what I have already done and what is inside my head! Today she began to read them in her time zone so I am now becoming slightly worried! This particular thing of mine has however now been tackled, just before I left to come to the UK for a visit.
We hadn’t already done this before then and although I love to watch someone masturbating, I have a huge issue with someone watching me. I struggle to come and nerves and my shyness get the better of me! YES! I am VERY shy!! I don’t care what you think if you have met me, I am very shy! So just before I left she told me to play with myself and I said no after a lot of humming and hawing. She wasn’t unhappy with me but she wasn’t happy either. Then I felt ashamed that I had said no to her.
It is a big thing for me to let my Mistress down and as I lay there on the bed looking at her with an obvious look of disappointment on her face, I struggled with what is a hard limit for me and letting her down. She asked me again if I was actually saying no to her and shook her head when I said I was. I could feel my face redden and my whole body blush as she stared at me. I spoke about my story and having written about it because it is a big thing for me to do and I have struggled with it in the past.
Before I knew where I was, my hand was between my legs and I began to play with myself. I had until that point still had no intention of even trying it never mind actually coming. I still have no idea what made me change my mind, although the shame I felt at saying no was destroying me and I suspect that along with my recent behaviour before we got together, it was just too much for me to do to her. As I played with myself and looked at my Mistress I found myself getting wetter and wetter. But, I didn’t think I was ever going to come in a million years. She being the most wonderful wonderful Mistress that she is joined her hand with mine and began to help me. Kissing me she told me she never said she wouldn’t help and thanked me for doing that for her as we both fucked me hard and I came just as hard.
The night before I left to go to London again for the London Fetish Fair I was 0n facetime saying good night to her having been out with an old friend drinking all night. She got me all horny and before I knew where I was my hand was between my legs and I was fucking myself as we spoke. Although she couldn’t see what I was doing other than a quick peek I gave her, I was actually playing for her and I know she enjoyed watching my face as I came very very quietly which she didn’t know I could do. I always make a huge noise when we are together, but I can come and unless you know me you wouldn’t know! My first Mistress liked to whisper things in my ear and say trigger words to me which would make me come without her touching me and I had to learn to keep quiet for that reason, as it was never good to make a noise in public really!!
So, the next time I play with myself for my Mistress I will be going it alone, as in this picture and I want to make sure I come too – I wonder if I will be able to get over this fear I have of being too exposed?
To see who else is joining in this Wicked Wednesday click this image below